Blog is Back

Hey All,

Ran into some creative difficulties with the blog, namely my vision versus reality. Yes it seems odd that happened this early into the blog, but such is life.

Basically my goal was to have almost a post a day and to have several contributors adding to that goal. At this time, couldn't find more writers so it will be primarily me writing when I can, which is difficult to do once a day.

So I will keep at it, though maybe not as consistent as I'd like to be. Keep checking!

Haha Jay Gruden...

May as well pop some bottles here in the 'Nati because Jay Gruden being gone and Hue Jackson being promoted can only be an upgrade for this squad.

Jay Gruden does deserve some credit for his time as the Bengals Offensive Coordinator, so I will get that garbage out of the way.

He came into Cincinnati with basically no receivers or quarterback and spent his time here molding them into solid players. Perhaps he is a good developer of talent and a good teacher. Players seem to like him, so thats nice.

At the end of the day, he had a ton of talented players and could not figure out a single way to use them. Andy Dalton sucks, lets make no mistake about that. Andy Dalton should never be throwing 50 times in a game, and probably shouldn't cross the 40 threshold too often either. Jay Gruden constantly failed to find ways to get guys the ball. People were excited about Tyler Eifert joining an already potent offense and could not get him consistently involved anywhere.

Most coaches can identify a weakness (Dalton) and try to work around it or minimize the negative effect it has on the team as a whole. This would include running the freaking ball once in awhile, and making adjustments or wrinkles to a game plan to throw opposing defenses off. San Diego players made no secret about the fact that the Bengals did exactly what they expected, there were no wrinkles or surprises. Not surprisingly, the Bengals were held to a season-low 10 points in the biggest game of the season.

Gruden decided that he was going to smash the square peg into a round hole and throw throw throw and constantly allow Dalton to put the Bengals in poor situations.

Get in there motherfucker!

 

 So fast forward to today..

Jay Gruden gets announced as the Head Coach of the Washington Redskins to the joy of all sensible Bengals fans. I did not listen to or watch his press conference but I did follow some of the reporters on Twitter and it sounds pretty damn hilarious.

• Gruden started by saying he was going to hold Robert Griffin III accountable and make him own up to mistakes and errors he makes.
• Hilarious because he had Andy Dalton shit the bed for 3 straight playoff seasons and following the most recent debacle, Dalton never once owned up to his 3 terrible turnovers and even managed to praise himself to the media
• Gruden said he was going to call his own plays in Washington

• Hilarious because he couldn't handle calling plays worth a shit in Cincinnati. He was mediocre (at best) and clearly struggled to find any way to throw opposing defenses off when it was his only job. How on Earth does he expect to do this in addition to the responsibilities of a Head Coach? 
•  Gruden said he would be making all personnel decisions for the Washington Redskins
• Hilarious for multiple reasons. First, this is another massive responsibility to add to the previous bullet point. Second, the only publicly known personnel decision we know of in Gruden's time as the Bengals Offensive Coordinator is the situation at Quarterback. The much maligned Mike Brown wanted to draft Colin Kaepernick and saw a lot of promise in him. Jay Gruden pushed for Andy Dalton and the rest is very depressing history.

Most teams are genuinely hurt when they lose a coordinator. When Mike Zimmer is hired by the Vikings, myself and many Bengals fans will be absolutely devastated. Jay Gruden leaving town is a massive blessing for this team. Good riddance, don't let the doors hit your ass on the way out.

So I Watch Glee...

Fuck.

Its true.

I watch the everliving shit out of Glee. I enjoy music, and its cool to have songs sung in a different way. The plot is super retarded and ridiculous. I own that.

Its been real self-respect. I'll miss you

 

Usually we beg for comments because comments liven this up. This time, I demand comments. I need to know the answer to a simple question.

Do I have the Gay?

 

Before you comment, watch this and tell me its not awesome.

Here We Are Again...

Well.... that was depressing. As a Cincinnati sports fan, there have been countless depressing losses. This one hurts more than any other. The pieces of the puzzle fell miraculously for the Bengals. Yeah, we didn't get that first round bye, but we got easily the worst team in all the playoffs to come to our house where we are unbeaten.

Could not have asked for a prettier set up to get our first playoff win under Marvin Lewis and to get the monkey off everyone's back that we cant do it.

Then the game started...

You watched the game, so there is not much need to go into the play by play. I'll use my list format to point out my thoughts about what caused the Bengals to drop this game, and then we'll move into the debacle of this organization and where we can look to from here.

1) Andy Dalton

Far and away responsible party #1 for this loss. Frankly, this guy disgusts me. He has absolutely no clue what he is doing out there. He makes awful play after awful play and just cannot get the job done here.  The second Andy feels pressure, he tucks and scrambles and the play is immediately over. His decision making is miserable, and if you read this Gregg Doyel article he refuses to take accountability for his actions.

The interceptions were abysmal. Throwing off his back foot and throwing an out route 5 yards inside right to a defender. Its not new to us, but it sure is still disgusting. The fumble maybe one of the funniest plays of this moron's career. Diving for a first down when you're 5 yards short of it and fumbling when untouched is so Dalton its ridiculous.

Even after all of that, I was still willing to just deal with Dalton because I don't feel he is going anywhere soon. He sucks, but maybe he'll mature in year four....

Until I read the Gregg Doyel article linked above. Andy Dalton is a lousy player, and an even lousier leader. When a leader shits the bed in a game and costs his team the game, he owns up to it. He says "I didn't make the play" or "I turned the ball over and really hurt us."

Dalton took zero blame, and even found an opportunity to praise himself for the good season he thinks he had.

2) Jay Gruden

The fact that Jay Gruden is a head coaching candidate somewhere is hilarious to me. Thank god he is, because maybe we will be relieved of him without the awkward firing of him. This guy is as clueless as they come and he has been all year. Tyler posted comments in his post from several players about the Bengals offense. Zero adjustments, zero wrinkles thrown in. The Chargers knew what the Bengals wanted to do, they took it away, and had nothing to worry about from an adjustment standpoint.

Jay Gruden calls a game as if he is playing a game of Madden. 30 yard passes on 4th and 3? Throwing on the goaline last week against Baltimore? The Redskins would do us a massive massive favor by getting this guy out of here as soon as humanly possible.

3) Marvin F**king Lewis

11 years.

0 playoff wins.

Really don't *need* to say any more than that. Marvin Lewis may be the single most infuriating coach I have ever witnessed in all of sports. If it isn't chuckling off hard questions, it's the simple "we just got beat today" answer to everything. 11 years, 0 playoff wins. 0-5 in the playoffs. 3 of those home games and you cant find a way to win a single one of them. I get that this team is technically still moving in the "right direction" but I'm just not sure how a team regroups after this loss and can honestly put faith in Marvin Lewis. You hear defensive players talk about how they would die for Zimmer. They'd give an arm and a leg for the guy. Have you ever heard a player suggest they'd give anything for Marvin Lewis or Jay Gruden?

Its been too long. It is time for Marvin Lewis to go.

My final comments are on this city as a whole. I love this city, and I don't intend to leave it as long as I live. That being said, my god this city has some of the dumbest sports fans I've ever encountered.

Look, I'm sure every city has its idiots, but good lord they sure find a way to make themselves heard here.

Mike Brown isn't the problem with the Cincinnati Bengals. (Yes, I realize he is in the above picture) I used to be one of the loudest voices opposing him because he was an idiot and he was out of touch. Mike Brown has come around if people have not realized this. He has lowered ticket prices (playoff prices not dictated by him), he is paying good money to keep top talent around, he has taken a step back in player personnel decisions. (Even though he wanted Kaepernick and Jay Gruden pushed for Dalton)

Someone actually called into the radio station today saying the Bengals didn't lose the owner and GM (who doesn't exist) did... okay then.

Finally, and I know I'm an extremely negative person. I am trying to work on that a bit...

But the Cincinnatians out there who are comforting yourselves by saying pitchers and catchers report in 40 days clearly have not paid attention to the Reds offseason, right? The Reds, who weren't good enough in 2013, lost 300 times on base in Choo, and replaced it with... Skip Schumacher and no clear plans to add someone else. Not seeing much to be positive about there?? I can't be alone right?

Finally, if the Bengals give Andy Dalton anything more than backup money, then I might just have to be done. I am not mentally or emotionally stable enough to watch that buffoon stink up this fine city any longer.

A Man Divided

When it comes to the Olympics, particularly the Winter Olympics, I truly am a man divided. To those of you that know me, (or can read the name I post under on this blog, or see any of my fantasy football team names), I am half Canadian. I am rather proud of that fact. Being a "Halfie" born in raised in the glorious U.S. of A. is really no big deal outside of the one month every four years of the Winter Olympics.

I... am a man divided.

The picture of a bald eagle making a maple leaf 

its bitch wasn't very fitting here.

Some may ask... who cares? Or why does it matter? Support them both, hope they both do well. I surely do. I hope Canada and USA is 1A and 1B in the medal count for the Winter Olympics. There is one sport though where I fear it is inevitable for them to face each other head to head in, and I cannot sit idly on the fence and have any self respect. 

The sport? My most beloved sport of hockey. (Exit 99.9% of my readers)

Yes, hockey. To those of you who write hockey off as a stupid sport, I get it, you don't understand it and you don't have a team so you aren't invested. Go watch a real game (not the shitty Cyclones) in person and you will gain a new respect for how fast, intense, and physical the game is. 

My entire life I have kept it plain and simple. I'm an American for the Summer Olympics, and I am a Canadian for the Winter Olympics. Win/Win and nobody gets hurt.

My dad and I have always enjoyed bonding over watching hockey and the Winter Olympics is like the World Cup in terms of intensity. He will 100% kick my ass if he reads this and realizes I have begun to consider myself divided in terms of hockey.

There are a few reasons I consider myself divided now, where in the past it was no question. Since I'm a list guy, (Yes, another stupid goddamn list) lets stick to that format.

1) I realized this year that it has been approximately 8 or more years since the last time I have been to Canada. I do plan on going back next year, but this is a long time for someone to claim to be a Halfie and not be in the country. 

Got my tuxedo ready.

When I was little, going to Canada was a once every other year sort of deal. I actually really did identify with being part Canadian and relished it. Given the time since my last visit and the fact that I have spent all of my live living and working in the USA, the reason for being conflicted is obvious.

2) I like winning, and while Canada will still be the favorite, the USA has, in my opinion, the best all around team they have ever had in this tournament. Canada has the majority of the stars, the Giroux, Stamkos, Crosby's of the world. USA has an extremely tough and talented roster, and the Americans hold an undisputed advantage at the goalie position. As much as I want them both to win, the inevitable game between these two teams will be the sporting event of the year, for hockey fans and hockey haters alike.

Ending image to the best hockey game

I have ever seen in my life.

When I was little, it was easy to root for Canada because it was a given that Canada would win. This was usually followed up with the brilliant trash talk that "of course you should win, its your only sport!" to which I chuckle, and point out that even the USA Mens Basketball Team has failed to win  Gold twice in my lifetime.

3) Good, fun, recognizable players that I am a fan of are finally getting their shot at playing for Team USA. For the longest time team USA would put guys on the ice that I just loathed with a passion. Guys like Jeremy Roenick and Chris Chelios. Brett Hull and Chris Drury. Just a bunch of buffoons that I cannot stand.

The USA team was announced on New Years Day and it is filled with awesome likeable guys. Johnathan Quick will be in the net for the Americans and this guy is absolute electric. My co-blogger and I saw JQ play against a stunningly bad cyclones team a few years ago in the lowly ECHL. This goalie was a freak, making just ridiculous saves look effortless. We had a hunch here and there that this guy would be someone special down the road.

Fast forward a few years and Johnathan Quick is the single best goalie in the world right now. To people who don't know much about hockey, a hot hand in nets can absolutely steal a tournament for you, and this is a massive advantage for the Americans.

Freaking Star

 A second guy who made the team that hits close to me is Max Pacioretty. I am a massive Montreal Canadiens fan and this guy has been the heart and soul of this team this year. He is a star and I am extremely excited he is finally getting a chance to shine.

(Sidebar: Absolutely amazing article on the USA Team selection process done by ESPN. It is long, but is extremely cool and worth reading. You can find it here.)

In summary.... I have absolutely no idea where my allegiance lies just yet. I am, as the title suggests, extremely divided. It is years of conditioning and father/son bonding versus the country I have called home all my life, supported by upcoming stars and very likeable figures.

The Olympics are a month away... I have some time, but it sure is dwindling fast!

P.S. start leaving comments on our posts, we want some feedback and banter!